Imagination

It's been a long time since Halloween was much more than a bump in the road on the rush to Christmas, but this year I have two little 3 years olds in my family that have been caught up in the "Whatcha goin' to be?" and have been eagerly planning their escape from reality to the fantasy of being their favorite character. Braxton of course, chose BUZZ LIGHTYEAR, And Avery chose CINDERELLA, she said I should be Sleeping Beauty, but I told her, The best I could do was be the "Fairy Grandmother!"

Ahh, but if I could for just a day, transform myself into someone else who would it be? There's lots of things I'd like to be:

thinner

fitter

smarter

funnier

more spiritual

I'd like to be able to really belt out a song...

but someone else? nah. I read somewhere "to thine own self...be enough". I think for Halloween this year, I'll be a thinner, smarter, funnier, etc, version of me.

Princes don't grow on Trees

I remember the first time I met Josh. I remember it because it was the first time I'd ever seen that look in Christina's eyes. It was a look of pure adoration. After he left, she confessed to me, "I really like him, mom". That was 6 years ago and "like" turned to "love" without much coaxing. She had never before, or has never since been able to give her heart to anyone else. So it didn't matter that it took 6 years, he owns her heart.
We were thrilled when she knocked on our bedroom door early one Sunday morning and sweetly told us that she and Josh were getting married. I have honestly never seen her look so happy.

Christina has always been this quiet, steady, dependable emotional rock for me. She instinctively senses what I need and has stood ready to give her love and support. As I laid in my hospital room after having back surgery, I was scared and hurting and drugged. I looked over to see who was at my bedside rubbing my hand. It was Christina. Softly stroking, with that sweet smile that conveyed absolute devotion. I woke several hours later and looked over to see my hand still in hers.

She has never demanded her slice of attention, preferring to take a backseat to some of her of her siblings that were more comfortable entertaining the crowd. I watched some old home movies the other day. I observed her standing in the background, watching some of the antics of her siblings. She was laughing but too shy too participate. I wanted to scoop up that little girl on the TV screen into my arms and tell her how much she means to me and what a priviledge it is to be her mom. I wanted to bring her into the middle of all the fun and say "Don't forget about her. Just because she's shy and quiet and won't compete for attention, don't forget to give her her some." The ironic thing is that when she does finally get a word in edge wise, she's freaking hilarious.

She has taught me so many things. Because of her I desire to be kinder because she has taught me the value of kindness. I want to love more deeply and show it with more devotion because she has touched me with her example. She has taught me to look for the quiet voices in the crowd and discover all that they have to offer.

I am so excited for her and Josh and their future together. They love to be together and enjoy and appreciate each other. Josh understands Christina, because he too is exemplary in his desire to be kind and serve those around him. He is not one who seeks attention but willingly gives to those who need him with no compuction and no expectation to get back anything in return. I feel like it is such a priviledge to have him as part of our lives. He truly is a noble man. Life just keeps getting better...I think there's someone I need to thank for that and believe me, I do, everyday, on my knees, I let Him know how blest I feel, because princes don't grow on trees and yet my daughters have each managed to find one.

Princess

Barry and I were invited to go to Disneyland this weekend with Christina and Josh. Since Barry's work is already 1/2 way to Jill's, we just met up at Jill's house in Goodyear and left from there. Well, Avery's eyes lit up when she heard the "D" word so we decided to bring her along. It's magical to see Disneyland through a child's perspective. She was actually greeting old friends when she saw Tigger and Pooh.

But the awe on her little face when she saw the "Princesses" brought tears to my eyes. It obviously meant so much to her. There was a place designated where kids could meet and greet the "Princesses".

She ran to each one with her arms out stretched. I couldn't believe how emotional I got. Her little face was just beaming. Afterwards, we came upon a parade and she watched mesmerized as each float went by. But when the float with Belle from "Beauty and the Beast" came by, Avery's face just lit up and she cupped her hands over her mouth and yelled,"Belle, it's me Avery!"

A Pirate's Life for Me

I like to think of myself as having a very creative streak. I have found an outlet for that creativity by learning how to manipulate photos. Really, it's a one woman party, as I'm giggling away at some of my creations. Well, this year our family reunion had "Pirates of the Caribbean" as it's theme and each family was to design a flag. There was a collective groan from all my family members when they heard I was pulling out the "Photo shop". Having been victims in the past, they didn't quite trust my discretion. Well, I thought they turned out pretty funny, mateys! Our flag was entitled "Protecting the Family Jewels" with pictures of the guys surrounding a treasure chest, where I had put all the rest of our faces on coins. Barry


Okay, so not everybody thought their pictures were all that flattering. But I only had so much to work with.

Happy Birthday Ben-jo-man

I'm glad I have an excuse to write a tribute to my youngest son. Today is his birthday. I have a picture of him when he was about 18 months old peeling an orange.

He was pretty determined to get at the flesh of that orange and he was not about to let something little like a bit of peel get in his way. I didn't know at the time how much of a foreshadowing that picture would be of his personality. Obstacles, have only been minor inconveniences to him. He approaches everything he does with a can do attitude. When he applied to get into the accounting program at BYU he didn't get accepted so he wrote them a letter. Still no postive results, so the next letter went to someone alittle higher up. The end result of the letters and phone calls was an admittance into the program. He graduated with a masters in accounting from BYU. He bought a CRAPPY old house and asked me where he should start with the renovations (my first thought was a MATCH!) I told him the windows, so the next thing I knew he was punching out windows. I asked him if he knew how to replace the old one with a new one? He said, "No but I'm sure I can figure it out." You should see that piece of crap house now! It's beautiful. Granite counter tops, new laundry room, porch, floors, stonework, windows, tile, light fixtures, etc.

I'm just so dang proud of that kid. He always sends me mother's day and birthday cards, which I appreciate, but he also sends them to my mom, which I think is extraordinary. He has a great capacity to feel and express gratitude and is one of the only guys I know to always send a Thank you card. I keep those cards because they mean a lot to me and they remind me of what an exceptional young man I have as a son.

We have developed quite a friendship as he has turned to me during the rough times the past few years. It's wonderful to see him so happy now. He has found someone who truly stands by his side and supports and loves him with her whole heart. She also gets his sense of humor so that's a BIG plus.

and when I think of him I just feel this tremendous feeling of love and pride and gratitude that the Lord would bless me with such an amazing man to be my son.

Finger Lickin' Good

I had a birthday this week. I came home from church to my daughter's, Spencer and my mom cooking a sumputous meal (poached salmon, baked potaoes, strawberry mango salad, homemade french onion soup, (YUM thanks Spence) and German Chocolate Cake made from scratch YUMMMMIIEE!! Avery was so excited about having a birthday party she REALLY wanted to help. So she volunteered to help blow out the candles

and pass out the cake to everyone.
Of course, she had to taste each piece before she handed it over!

I've decided my house looks a little tired so I asked for some new light fixtures for my birthday. So far Barry and I have only gotten one of the three hung. We are waiting for Ben to come and tackle the harder ones. But it's still such a boost to get a change.

A Man For All Seasons

I remember having a conversation with Ben awhile ago. Someone had told him that it was wise to date someone all four season's before you married them. Their rationale was that there is a lot that can change with each season; moods, interests, hobbies, etc. and it's best to know those things up front. Well, I'm way passed the need to find a marriage companion but I've have come to the point in my life where I can mark it by "Seasons" and I can see an analogy of finding someone for your life's partner that could endure all the season's of your life together.

Spring..the growing season, the newness of being together, of having young children, finding a path, starting traditions...

Summer...The kids all at home, the noise, the laughter, the heat of the moments, youthfulness...

Fall...the harvest, the lesson's bearing fruit, thankfulness, kid's departing on their chosen paths...

Winter...the newness of being together, of having young children in our lives again, of redefining ourselves.

I have found it to be true, you can find out a lot about someone with every season's change. I've learned that Barry would do anything for me or his kids. Barry has always been willing to make personal sacrifices ( sole exception being that little black Camero!!!) of time, money, energy so that we could have comfortable, joy filled lives. I've learned that he is a man with unparalleled integrity. I never doubt his sincerity or honesty. In the moments when no one else would know otherwise, I find him on his knees in prayer or reading the scriptures. I've learned that there is no greater joy that he receives in this life than being with his family. He is incredibly proud of each one of them. There is no man that has ever enjoyed his grand kids more than Barry. The look in those little people's eyes when they see their grandpa is a testament to his love for them. I've learned through this horrible illness my father has gone through, the capacity of Barry's devotion and love and his kindness, his incredible kindness. I love to just be together. I get flowers, just because. If he could, he would deny me nothing. How could I have known the measure of this man when I chose him all those years ago? The seasons of our lives have revealed truly a man for ALL season's and I couldn't be more grateful. Happy Father's Day, sweetheart.